If you don't read The Onion, you should.

This article, and this line specifically, makes me wizz in my pants.

"...the canvas bins heaped with broken stemware in aisle six may be a sign that T.J. Maxx is on the verge of complete bankruptcy. Either that, or it's doing perfectly fine. It's impossible to say which."

Everyone could use a recession proof laugh. Read the whole thing here.