Family. It’s a word loaded with meaning…and perhaps absent of meaning. I am in search of it. You may be in search of it. But what exactly is “it”? What is family?
This is perhaps the easiest definition of family. Parents + Kids = Family. The problem with this definition is that over sixty percent of today’s children come from broken homes. So kids today have more than simply parents. We have step parents, half parents, adoptive parents. They have parents who abandon, injure, and forget. Sooo…I don’t like this definition. Parents + Kids rarely equals family…or at least the kind of family I desire.
Ahhhh yes…the extended family. Common ancestry makes you think of that third grade family tree project, doesn’t it? I tried to do my family tree thing and I discovered that my great-great-great-great grandpa invented the windshield wipers. Am I seeing any financial benefits of sharing ancestry with this brilliant inventor? Nope. Extended family generally confuses me. There are many who will spend WEEKS with their extended family around the holidays and then not talk to them for 11 months. I imagine that those who interact with family in this way, value the DNA strand that holds everyone together in a way that I do not. It is in this definition that we find our blood to be our common thread. Is that family? It might be…but this is not what I am in search of.
I love this definition. It makes me think of me and a bunch of pals living in the same place, committing to a common cause, and living life with a shared vision. But as I think about this definition, I sense that something is missing. There is something about this definition that makes me feel like anyone can enter a family. This definition feels more like the definition of a community rather than that of a family. It feels like there is an open door and at any moment Kramer can come sliding through right into my family. Is that a bad thing? I don’t know.
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